The
Whole Truth
The Twilight Zone
The hero of this
tale is a used-car salesman who keeps a pile of heaps on his lot with signs
that say “Like New!” or “Get a Honey from Hunnicut”
(and a large one on the back wall, “Absolutely Dependable”).
He’s a one-man two-party system, in one brilliant display of
Serling’s writing prowess, Hunnicut runs down “late-model
propaganda” for “post-54s” as denying “the dignity of
traditional craftsmanship” strictly for profit against one’s fellow
man, all this said for the benefit of a young couple eyeing the merchandise
warily. To the old gleep who drives in a nice-looking Model A for sale and
says, “They built them better in the old days, I think,” he offers
the contrary spiel on the energetic combination of “mind and
muscle” that puts together the car of today.
The car is
haunted, he is told. Honest Luther Grimbley of the 13th Ward looks
it over, but the new owner has to tell the truth, about everything. “Holy
Hannah,” says Grimbley, suggesting his rival in the 12th Ward
as a buyer, or the Mayor. “The greatest gag of all time” would be
to sell it to Nikita Khrushchev, which Hunnicut does, as a sample of the
average American’s car.
“Can you
get me through to Jack Kennedy?”, he asks the telephone operator.
Sheldon directs
this continuously with cameras all over the set.
A Penny for Your Thoughts
The Twilight Zone
Johnson’s
mild bank employee instantly recalls Nabokov’s ape. “It is
discerned spiritually,” says Blake the painter and engraver.
Serling’s
guardian angel endows him with this gift. Struck by a car, berated by his boss,
he hears the driver’s contumely and the rascal’s scheme though
unspoken.
This Strange
Interlude with its audience of one concludes in a love match.
“Helen,” says the spectator, “I can’t hear what
you’re thinking!” Patting him with her gloved hand, she replies,
looking up into his eyes, “Can’t you?”
The presence of
Dan Tobin as the boss, and certain effects that play upon speech and silence,
possibly indicate a familiarity however acquired with the cans of film then all
but unbroadcast labeled The Fountain of Youth (dir. Welles, prod.
Arnaz).
Long Distance Call
The Twilight Zone
This appears to
be a structural evaluation of Cocteau’s Les Parents terribles (and
Les Enfants terribles) and Orphée. The dramatic pivot occurs when
the father pleads with his late mother for the life of his son, her grandson,
by means of the toy telephone she gave the boy.
Sheldon’s
direction is of the very finest, videotaped live in the various rooms of a
suburban house. Every composition is telling, the actors are treated ideally
and educe a correct reading which is handled for the purposes of the drama
first and foremost. The sense of urgency communicated by the line of continuous
action is brought into play, a very different thing from film or theater,
pointed as it is at every moment by the intimacy of the mise en scène
and the controlled resources of the director.
It’s a Good Life
The Twilight Zone
A small town in
Ohio suffers the tyranny of a psychic six-year-old boy with magical powers,
whose whims and megrims determine the instantaneous fate of the inhabitants.
Things either
please him like a toy, or are instantly dispatched to the oblivion of
“the cornfield”. No mental reservations are permitted to those who
witness his cruelties, which must be judged as “good”. One man
rebels, adjuring the others to cave the monster’s skull in, and is turned
into a jack-in-the-box.
“Monster”
is Serling’s word for the boy, who creates his own television shows for
everyone to watch forcibly, prehistoric agones that must be applauded.
“I kinda
liked it a little bit better,” says an audience member, “when we
had cities outside, and we could get real television, things like
that.”
Still Valley
The Twilight Zone
“Ye soldier
conjured here in the name of the Prince of Darkness”, out of a book
called Witchcraft, in Virginia shortly before the Battle of Gettysburg,
by the seventh son of the seventh son of a seventh son, “a witch man like
my pappy before me.”
Union soldiers on
the march stand motionless, “not dead, not alive, just frozen stock-still
like rocks,” a structure related to Charles Beaumont’s
“Elegy”.
The direct
surrealism of this is absolute and unequivocal. The South can win the war by
renouncing God and immobilizing the Union. Sergeant Paradine, given the chance,
refuses to do so.
I’ll Be
Judge—I’ll Be Jury
The Alfred Hitchcock
Hour
The title is from
Lewis Carroll’s calligramme on Fury and the mouse. The teleplay is
practically a variant of Psycho. A man and wife sail their yacht from
New York to Mexico, where she is strangled to death while he siestas before
their picnic in the countryside. He suspects the fellow who nearly ran her down
on the road. With the authority of the police, he befriends the man, who lives
with his mother and runs a tackle shop.
Their
conversations about women convince the widower that he has the right man. The
police, however, need evidence, so he decides to kill the fellow himself, but
the killer gets the best of him.
The victim’s
sister and brother-in-law investigate his death, feign to blackmail the man,
goad him into another attempt and force him to a bell tower, where he confesses
to both murders and a third on pain of being hanged by his neck from the bell.
The police arrive on the instant and arrest him.
Hitchcock says
afterward that the brother-in-law was later made to understand his actions were
beyond the pale.
TV or Not TV
My Mother the Car
“Why does
dinner always taste better after
dinner?”
A
comfort in a dark garage, television. “You are a clever man, Willman, for
one who has lived but one lifetime.” Savage toy kills living room set.
“Pretty
smart car you’ve got for a mother.”
“Thanks a
lot, fairy godmother.” Barbs to the automotive experts.
“Are you sure?”
“I oughta be, I’m wearing one.”
The Giant Mystery Prize “probably wouldn’t even fit in our garage.”
“It would
if you took the TV out. I’m just kidding.”
To Each Her Own
That Girl
Donald’s
idea for an article on computer dating, close but no cigar.
It’s what
one “ordered”, after all, more or less (her date is played by Rich
Little).
Gidget Grows Up
UCLA student
Gidget heads to New York as a tour guide at the United Nations. “You can
face tomorrow without turning your back on today,” says her father, the
professor (Robert Cummings). She wonders if that’s Matthew Arnold.
“Dad” is the reply.
Gidget takes up
with an Australian agronomist (Edward Mulhare) in the Food and Agriculture
Organization. Moondoggie serves with the United States Air Force as a captain,
he has a sometime attachment to a Swedish girl, Katrina Lund (pronounced Loont).
An Arab prince
wants Gidget for his twelfth bride. An African nation enlists her sympathies
for recognition. She befriends a Village filmmaker passionately involved with
silent history, Louis B. Latimer (Paul Lynde), “Louie B.”. His
“aboveground epic” Smiles incorporates hers, she switches
film cans at a UN screening so that propaganda against recognition is replaced
by Smiles, it’s granted for one reason and another, though she is
suspended from her post.
Now a permanent
alliance with the agronomist is undertaken, Gidget is reinstated at the UN.
Moondoggie’s protestations are in vain, he bivouacs in Greenland
surveying sex among the Eskimos, Mr. Lawrence flies there to reason with him. A
very grown-up Gidget accepts Moondoggie’s proposal of marriage under
Fourth-of-July fireworks in New York.
The crucial pivot
from Wendkos to Swackhamer.
Buried Alive
McMillan & Wife
The title refers
not only to Mac’s friend Carmichael, reliably reported as dead and buried
thirty years before, but to the practice among spies of planting a
“sleeper” in the enemy ranks, an agent brought up in ascending
circles until required for active service.
The structure is
in two main parts, responding to the abstract nature of the subject. Sheldon
builds quite a Hitchcockian ambience throughout, mostly from North by
Northwest, until the final scene at the airport, which is closely derived
from Bullitt.
It develops that
Carmichael was caught and “turned” in 1964 while undercover in
Eastern Europe, had come back tired and with a new face, fell in love, and was
ready to give up a sleeper in exchange for money and a new identity.
His Agency boss,
Walt Harmon (an old hand at “the dirty tricks business”), was their
CO during the war, and brings down the weight of the government on Mac to avoid
a breach of security.
This is one of
Howard Berk’s finest creations. It begins at the zoo, where Mac and Sally
have a bet about the bears, the point of which is males are superior or not,
and the upshot is that Mac has to cook dinner, unassisted.
Walt Harmon is
introduced with a surreal device. Sgt. Enright meets Mac and Sally in the city
during their investigation, and reminds the Commissioner that he is due to
christen a ship. They dash off, and the ship is revealed to be a new SFPD
helicopter. “I christen thee number seven three eight four,” says
Sally as she breaks a bottle of champagne over the stern. The chopper takes
off, in front of a formal police gathering, the camera turns around and
there’s Harmon, leaning on his car.
The Adventure of Miss
Aggie’s Farewell Performance
Ellery Queen
Miss Aggie is a
principal in Middleville, a radio character who steers people over life’s
shoals. The mechanism of her death has a twofold interest. First, the actress
playing her wants more money, the writers threaten to kill her off,
dramatically, the actress poisons herself lightly during a broadcast so as to
attract publicity. In the hospital, she’s murdered for real.
Second, this
murder is filmed by Sheldon as a POV with a pillow for silencer, so the look of
alarm on the victim’s face is met with a screen full of feathers as the
shot is fired.
The agent did it,
looking to promote a kinder young actress. Four actors at their Rockefeller
Center microphone stands, the Wurlie-player off to one side, director and
technicians in the booth, the stern sponsor (whose wife never misses the
program), Inspector Queen’s crash diet.
“Come on,
son, let’s get out of this wonderful world of show business and grab a
piece of cheesecake at Lindy’s. Maybe two.”
The Adventure of the Mad
Tea Party
Ellery Queen
This marvel is
one of the Ellery Queen stories arranged for television by Peter S. Fischer under
the eye of Robert Van Scoyk, a concatenation of circumstances which would
explain, without recourse to the shooting schedule, why Sheldon has his hands
full.
The occasion is a
Broadway adaptation of a work by Ellery Queen, only in production talks but
giving rise to this fancy-dress party on a Lewis Carroll theme.
Here is a
visionary work for connoisseurs, particularly those who go downtown to art
openings at abandoned bank buildings, in the vault, as it were.
The Deadly Cure
McMillan & Wife
Mac is wounded
shielding Sgt. Enright from a drug dealer’s bullet. While under sedation
awaiting surgery, he sees a patient smothered with a pillow by two men dressed
as surgeons.
The script is an
intricate mystery involving a “Mr. Big,” AKA “The
Possum,” who heads “the biggest drug ring in the state.” All
Mac has is a cryptic message from his undercover officer, whose whereabouts are
unknown.
The hospital
scenes twice call upon Hudson to give a portrayal of Mac in a lurching state of
near-insensibility. There is an aftertaste of John Frankenheimer’s Seconds.
Sheldon
introduces the key scene with an exploratory camera following the nurse at her
station, picking up the gurney wheeled in from the other end of the corridor,
and catching Mac’s reaction.
The Dilemma
Alice
Out to
Mel’s Diner in roadside Arizonaland comes Vince, an admirer from way
back. He runs a business of his own in New Jersey, importing “Early
American furniture from Korea”, he would like to marry Alice and return
there.
She has no wish
to be in the trammels, and besides, she doesn’t love him.
The waitresses
want more money, Mel cuts pies into smaller slices for more tips.
Directed to the
point by Sheldon.