One of Our Engines Is Missing
McHale’s Navy

“The fightinest PT crew afloat” are put out of action by the need for an overhaul, Capt. Binghamton simply annuls his adversaries and prepares to ship McHale to FleetCom for reassignment, pending an inspection by the matériel officer.

A gallant campaign is fought to sustain PT 73 with odd parts from anywhere, but without success. A new PT boat arrives, Binghamton’s personal craft. The matériel officer inspects PT 73, all is in order, also on Binghamton’s boat. The captain is mystified, until the inspection is over and the matériel officer has to commandeer his boat because his own has ceased to operate.

McHale, sunnily fishing aboard PT 73, drink in hand, receives a call to ferry Capt. Binghamton to New Caledonia.


Instant Democracy
McHale’s Navy

“We got rid of it.” Gruber sells an old jeep to Chief Urulu, it has no engine, two subjects pull him along.

The court-martial is nixed, native labor is needed to put B-17s on a longer airstrip.

Democracy is explained as profitability. “Workmen pay dues, me own union... wish me heard of democracy sooner.” A strike is called to win Navy coconuts during the ten-minute break, which according to contract means a break every ten minutes. “Him management, me union, we bargain, good union contract.”

“We vote him out,” says McHale.

Maloko wins, replacing Urulu, who is immediately appointed “Secretary from Labor”.

“Somebody up there hates me,” says Capt. Binghamton, who has had to buckle under and work with McHale as friendly with the natives, there’s a war on. “You mean, beside the one between you and me?”

“Still think something rotten in Denmark, wherever that is.”

“You finger-painted John L. Lewis!”